8

dear canada,
just wanted to take a moment to thank you for drew doughty. he's the best thing in the universe and i have you to thank. good job.

sincerely,
me

what do you mean it's december 11?

what the hell?! five minutes ago it was september. i'm confused.

can i just say that, ok, it's december 11th and the kings are still kicking ass? tonight they got their 20th win of the season. this is significant because:
1. they are the first team to do this in the western conference
2. last year, it took them until january 29 to reach 20 wins.
now they're only one point back of the conference leading sharks, putting them in second overall. this is hot stuff, people.

you know what else is hot stuff? this baby:




and i still think it's really weird that ilan rubin lives down my street. i see him, and every time it's like WHY AREN'T YOU SOMEONE COOLER?! (and by "someone cooler" i obviously mean "robin finck").

parsley!

dude, parse's goal tonight was awesome!

so's this rain. too bad it's going away tomorrow. at least it's staying cold :)

FML

i do not want to go to bed
i do not want to get up in less than 6 hours and get dressed and drive to work
i do not want to spend all day at work bored and annoyed (being bored makes generally tolerable people absolutely obnoxious)
i do not want to sit in horrible traffic on the way home and obsess about how god damn motherfucking long it takes to get home
i do not want to come home at 5, tired and without the will to do anything productive and then realize i'm just tired because i spent all day excruciatingly bored and i'm tired because i spent a ton of energy being absurdly pissed off at the traffic

instead i want to stay up late and wake up mid-morning and take dog to the park and then maybe, like, go to a museum or go bowling or something. and then i'd like to go to class. i miss my life from two years ago. i really need to figure my shit out, right? there's got to be a way to not be miserable 5 days out of 7.

daydreaming

i hope this is my life someday.


ps- (i have a new 40" lcd hdtv. it's sexy. peek snuggles with me while i watch it. life's grand. i'm just sayin'... there's definitely room for three more dogs)

for the lolz

the best thing ever

probably the cutest video ever, featuring the two best animals ever, and they're bestest buddies. :D they really need to make a movie with these two. it's so cute i want to cry!

jackson rathbone-me

tonight was really fun. finally got to visit the viper room, and i was surprised by just how small (and dark!!!) that place is. seriously, the bar takes up half of the space. but it's a great place to see a show. and i'm surprised by how much i liked the band. yay!

the only problem with driving to la on the weekend (especially back and forth on the same day) is that it makes the weekend seem sooo much shorter. like, where did sunday go? oh yeah! i just spent 4 hours in the car.

also, i'm addicted to rock band. i just want to quit my job and play rock band drums all day long.

oh, and this is gross:

:D

just saw hanson for the second night in a row. these guys are fun, man! i hope they never stop touring.

wait, it gets better?

i thought i was up in la this weekend to catch the kings/preds game tomorrow afternoon. that would have been enough for me. but then, katie surprised me with tickets to see hanson right after the game, literally across the street!!!! so basically we're going to have a super manly start to the day and a super teenage girly end of the day. :D

i just KNEW that if i stared at that gif long enough, something good would come of it! =P

so ready for the kopitar-taylor hanson fest tomorrow.

just another reason la > sd.

i love the time change

i love looking out at 5:22 and seeing that it's dark in the backyard. as you all know, i'm a big fan of nighttime. i'd rather do everything at night. so the sooner night starts, the more stuff i can do at night. duh. i also wish the weather would make its fucking mind up already. it was so lovely for like, four days. and then it has been creeping back up to the 80s. if only it could be 60 degrees and gray all the time. oh well.

so it's november 5, and the last time i really updated was the 12th of october, when i said:
"i have this paranoid voice in my head that keeps telling me that when i revisit this post in a month i'll be depressed because the kings will have gone back to being frustratingly mediocre."

i'm a week short of this, but oh well. i'm happy to announce that the frustrating mediocrity is nowhere in sight. :D kopitar is no longer tied for the points lead-- he owns it. and he's also second in goals. and quick is second in most wins for a goalie. and doughty's second in defenseman scoring. and drewiske's third in +/-. and the kings are second in the division, one point behind the sharks. ummm... this is hot stuff. i don't think they'll be able to keep this up (especially kopitar, i love him but no way he's holding onto this lead for good... especially when ovechkin comes back from injury), but i think i'm beginning to trust that they're going to be much better this season. hurrah!

---

i'm trying to kill time until 7:30 (pens vs. kings, and it's gonna be good). since i'm in the mood to type and hear the keys go, but not in the mood to actually write anything, i think i'll do a survey. they're entertaining and make me feel like i'm 17 again. i recommend it. :( god i'm old.

Do you ever miss being in first grade?
i kind of wish i could do childhood over. there are many things i'd change.

As a younger teenager, did you have any older guys/girls hit on you?
sometimes. all the creepers come out when you're walking with your best friend in downtown chula vista.

Do you think abortion should be legalized in the United States?
well it already is. as it should be.

What is one country you want to visit someday?
japan

How much time do you usually spend online in one sitting?
it really depends on what i'm doing. if i'm just making the rounds, then 15 minutes. if i get sucked into lgk or ontd, then like, 45 minutes or an hour. :(

When you're at the movies, do you get popcorn and a drink?
i don't care about popcorn, but i usually sneak a drink in. those prices are a joke. oh, but when i go to the hillcrest theatre, i usually get a vegan cookie. those things are goooood.

Would you ever want to be changed into a vampire?
i think it depends on which version of vampire we're talking about. but generally, i think it would be pretty cool.

Does the thought of living forever scare you in any way?
yeah that would suck. ...but vampires can die, right?

How many annoying people do you shun off daily?
there are like, 4 people at work i cannot stand.

Have you ever done something too embarrassing to mention?
well yeah. so i won't mention 'em.

If you have a MySpace, what do you usually post bulletins about?
awww, poor little myspace. totally taken over by its classier cousin facebook.

Has anyone ever told you that you had months to live?
no

How many times a day do you usually eat a full meal?
usually two

How many times daily do you talk to your significant other/crush?
at least once

As a teenager, were you trusted to be alone with your significant other?
nope. having boys in the room was always very scary for my parents, and the door had to be open. but girls in my room? that wasn't a problem. fools.

Do both your parents have jobs?
my mom does. i don't know what my dad is doing.

Do you live anywhere nearby a "hicktown"?
not really

Have you ever had a friends with "benefits" relationship with someone?
i made the strangest noise when i read that. i'll just leave this one alone.

At family gatherings, are you more likely to hang out with the younger or older relatives?
younger.

Have you ever had the power go out while you were in the bathroom at nighttime?
not that i can remember

What TV commercial are you sick of seeing?
AH!!!!!!!!!! any car insurance commercial. that progressive insurance girl used to be cute, but now it's like k byeeeeeeeee. on the other hand, have you ever seen those messing with sasquatch commercials? those never get old :D also the nhl 2k10 commercial with jack johnson and the hockey moms. they play it like 10 times per game, but i'm still not sick of it.

When was the last time someone complimented your hair?
can't remember. my hair's not looking cute right now.

What makes your favorite television show unique?
that would probably be queer as folk. and what makes it unique? it has naked guys fucking. that's pretty damn unique.

Do laugh tracks on TV shows annoy you?
>:O yes!

Do you think dreadlocks are awesome or gross?
on robin finck? awesome. everyone else? gross. they're a-stinky!

Do you know anyone named Jesus?
sadly, no.

What is your favorite thing about concerts?
everything except the ancitipation before it starts. i miss concerts :( i'm still in my trent-or-no-one phase. i wonder when that will end. (although i think if jack white were to come around these parts, i wouldn't say no)

What color was the last piece of gum you ate?
green

Where do you get blisters the most?
feet.

Do you always use conditioner when you wash your hair?
yeah.

Have you ever been to a high school football game? If so, was it in warm or cold weather?
i think i went to one in 9th grade. and it's southern california, so it was probably fresh at best.

What's a nickname you want for yourself, but nobody actually calls you by?
lol j-man and channies. ummm, i don't have any super awesome nicknames for myself.

Is there anything on your phone that you wouldn't want me to see?
yeah, there are some compromising texts and e-mails. ...maybe i should delete those now?

Michael Cera plays the same character in every movie. Agree/disagree?
yup. you know who doesn't? james franco. you know who should be in more movies? james franco. you know what james franco should do in those movies? be naked.

Have you ever taken a survey that had a dated reference (like the one above might be someday)?
yeah

What language(s) would you most like to learn?
portuguese. mmmm. although learning chinese or arabic would be very practical.


Any guilty pleasure movies/music/TV shows?
just one comes to mind, and it's so guilty i'm not even going to tell you what it is. it's baaaaad.

Have you ever wanted to change your birthday?
umm...

Do you enjoy running?
not really. it hurts my boobs.

If you have a pimple, will you pop it?
did you know you can watch videos of people doing that on youtube? WHO records that?!?!

Describe the first pair of shoes you remember wearing.
i don't remember that at all. sorry.

Do you think hovercrafts will ever really exist?
totally

Who do you think has a sexy voice?
kate moennig. alan rickman.

What time were you born?
at like 4 in the afternoon.

What's your favorite Pokémon?
I don't know anything about that shit. <~~~~ that person's answer made me laugh

Are you a creeper?
loooooool. i have my moments. katie's actually been there for most (if not all) of them.

Any deadly allergies?
not that i know of. but i've never been stung by a bee, soooooooo who knows?

Do you use public restrooms or try and avoid them?
try my very best to avoid them. there are certain ones i can count on to be pristine, though. my work and staples come to mind.

What's your ideal room temperature?
i was at a hotel and it was 67 according to the air conditioner thing. i liked it.

Do you know anyone who tries too hard?
nobody comes to mind

Can you do laundry?
honey, i'm a pro

When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
a music journalist. and then almost famous came out and it was my dream. and then journalism died and rolling stone stopped caring about music.

Are you photogenic?
hahahahahaha

Who's your most recent musical discovery?
ummm... the old haunts.

What's your favorite episode of your favorite TV show?
OH that's hard!!!!!! the one where babylon explodes is pretty fantastic. and the one where brian finally lets justin top him. OH THE ONE WHERE BRIAN SHOWS UP AT JUSTIN'S PROM!!!!!!!!!! so basically, any episode where something out of the ordinary happens with brian and justin. or whenever brian's naked. which is often.

Do you wear hats?
only when i go to the zoo or disneyland. dude, grad night at disneyland was so bomb. i wish they did that for non high school kids.

Who's your favorite Beatle?
paul!

How many cousins do you have?
i don't know

Do you wear sweatpants in public?
i don't own sweatpants.

Describe your physically ideal boyfriend/girlfriend. Feel free to indulge and be as elaborate as possible.
lol. i don't have an ideal, really. what makes an individual attractive is that person's individuality. generally, though, i like tall boys. and i'd stick robin finck's arms on anyone.

Any childhood celebrity crushes?
taylor hanson. but i'm soooo over that now. wait, what's that? you saw my last post? oh.

What's the last item of clothing you purchased?
leggings and a skirt.

Are you one of those weirdos that like cold pizza?
yep

Higginbotham: terrible or awesome last name?
awww

What was your best Halloween costume?
i'm not really into dressing up. although i think the pirate wench was probably my favorite.

Do you like colored contacts?
i don't like contacts

What's your favorite color scheme?
black and pale blue or black and dark red or black and pink. and sometimes, pink and red.

Do you prefer zip hoodies or pullover hoodies?
zip zip zip

If there's a typo or grammatical error in a survey, will you correct it?
if it's really bad.

Do you enjoy foreign films? If so, what's your favorite? If not, is it because of the subtitles?
if i like a foreign movie, it's not because it's foreign. it's because it's good. but no, subtitles don't bother me.

Ever been to 4chan?
i was trying to figure that out back when that cute girl allison was on antm. i'm still confused about what it is.

Did you ever own a license plate souvenir thing with your name on it?
my name is never an option

What's one thing everyone loves but you seem to hate?
in n out. hamburgers. bacon. beef and pork in general. ewww pork. also, big ass cars. those are so damn popular around here. and football! everyone loves it! my ultimate hell? being forced to eat a bacon cheeseburger while driving in a lifted truck to a chargers game! AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What about something you love but everyone else hates?
unsweetened iced tea.

"Cara-mel" or "car-mel"?
never thought about it. it changes. i don't really say that word often.

Do you wear brown with black?
I don't wear brown ever. It's the color of poop, ok? <~~~~ another win answer from the previous person!!! brown's tied with orange for the ugliest color ever.

How do you deal with stress?
if i get too stressed, i become physically ill. so i guess my body deals with it for me.

Your nails, do they need to be clipped?
yup. regulation lesbian length.

because i can't stop watching it

i'll update with something real. one day.

update!

probably only for katie's benefit, but whatever. new mugshots are up and they look slightly less ugly in these. especially justin willians (the guy on the right).

wait, is it really october 12?

so much and nothing has happened. they're back and it's better but it's also worse. this has been going on for well over a year now, and it had become just a sad part of life, you know? and then they went away for over a month and i honestly almost forgot about it. like, it was always there but without the physical daily reminder, i forgot what she looked like. i forgot what she was like. and the emails and letters were all upbeat and excited and you know... it was easy to fool myself into believing that maybe things were improving. but now they're back, everyone is fighting again, and a half a can of soup for dinner is a struggle. it's weird that this beast has so many heads, and once you manage to cut one off, the next one is just waiting to get you. fifty soups, half a soup, two sides of the same coin? it's fucking hard to watch, man.

but enough about that.

here was my wonderful view in vegas. i tell you, it was a lot nicer looking at the twinkle lights instead of a big ass air conditioner (my usual view).



-----

so... the kings. yeah, the first game of the season (the only one i've been to so far) sucked balls. it was one of the worst hockey games i've ever seen that team play. but after that shitfest, they have gone 4-0 and are kicking some major ass. they look so scary good. it's very, very exciting. and today, while i was at work, some of my lgk people informed that they won their game against the islanders (4 in a row, whoo!), were leading the conference, kopitar is tied for the points lead, quick was chosen as the #2 star of the week, and that the kings were ranked 3rd in the power rankings. and i was like omg:




that's a whole crapload of really good news. but you see, in all my years of being a kings fan, i've never seen them ranked that high and i've definitely never seen them start a season 4-1. that's hot. the last time that happened was 1992. i was seven and definitely not paying attention to hockey. oh, and some guy is giving me all his old kings tapes of classic games :D i'm going to pick them up when i'm in la in a few weeks. :D anyhow, who knows how long this burst of amazingness will last, but it has been fun. they're playing the rangers on wednesday and detroit thursday (that's one very brutal back to back) and i guess that will be the real test there. but man, i was doing backflips over the acquisition of ryan smyth and i am definitely not disappointed. that guy is phenomenal. i think the first line has combined for something like 22 points in 5 games lol. ok i'm done talking hockey. i have this paranoid voice in my head that keeps telling me that when i revisit this post in a month i'll be depressed because the kings will have gone back to being frustratingly mediocre.

-----

i'm really obsessed with moving out. it will probably happen fairly soon. :D

also, how great is all the halloween merch at target? i can't wait til nov. 1 because i plan on going to target and getting all kinds of great stuff 50% off. they have this shower curtain with these dancing skeletons that i want. 15 dollars? no. 7.50? yes! everyone at work is obsessed with me dressing up but i have no idea what to be. any ideas?


-----

i'm going through an all jack white, all the time phase. especially live white stripes. that is one very crazy performer. i reeeeaelly wish he'd stop fucking around with all his side projects and tour as the white stripes and squawk up everything from icky thump, because i haven't really heard that album live yet. and white stripes songs aren't complete until jack has made them all insane and squawky in a live setting.

i went to borders today to get that espn magazine, and the picture they used in the mag is different than the one i posted. it's more scandalous. i actually couldn't buy the magazine because i couldn't put that picture up. i blush just thinking about it. oh well.

i'm rambling. OH! i got the most amazing presents from europe! but i think my favorite thing is this nacho libre video game for my ds. it's really hard to play because i laugh the entire time. it has all the best clips from the movie and the games are really, really absurd. like, throw melons at nacho. hop over angry bulls. swat bugs as they land on el esqueleto. good stuff. AND while i was at work, i said something from the movie to my boss, and she goes "I KNOW HIM!" and it turns out that her brother's cousin is dating the actor who plays nacho's sidekick. she said he's hilarious and his boyfriend's name is toto and they live in mexico city. somehow his being gay makes me love him even more. i really wanna hang out with him and make him say stuff all day long. jellizz. i guess i need to go to mexico city.

ok i think i'm done.

wait, last thing, the kings have one of the ugliest first lines in hockey:




here's what the blues have:





and here's what the sharks have:




i'd do more, but it's too hard grabbing the mugs. just take my word for it. i don't think there's an uglier trio. ok bye.

0_o

i know i haven't written anything in a while. and i do have a lot to say. but i need time. so in the meanwhile, i just have to post this:



espn magazine had the fucking BRILLIANT idea of doing a "body issue," where they convinced athletes to take naked pictures. and they were kind enough to include hockey players. pretty hockey players. i guess this means borders after work tomorrow. :D

ok, bed. i'll write something useful one day.

horrifying!

godDAMN!

my leg does not go up that high, does yours?

suspensesuspensesuspense... YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i won't summarize the game. i will say that this crowd was SO FUN! and kopitar won the game on a penalty shot that was so smooth and beautiful that he made it look easy. since this was preseason (and since hockey doesn't matter to the southwest corner of the country at all), this wasn't broadcast on tv. but, luckily, some fans were kind enough to film the shot and share. these clips make me happy, so i'm posting them:

1. this one is a ultra crappy camera phone clip and you can't see what's happening. i just love it because of the celebration at the end when you can see the crowd going nuts (actually, i love the almost dead-quiet when everyone holds their breath just before kopi takes the shot and THEN the huge YAAAAAAAAY!!!). it was SO LOUD in there:



2. this person did a surprisingly great job of capturing the actual goal, but with less audience craziness:


CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SEASON OPENER NEXT WEEK! :D

:D

Dude, this place is so fun!
Spotted all my favorite hockey players (anze kopitar isn't a beast in person, jack johnson is HUGE and jonathan bernier is gorgeous!) Went to the rowdiest hockey game of my life-- kings won! Had curry/plum/apricot/cherry chicken for dinner. And now I'm watching dueling pianos and drinking a deeeeelicious mojito. And I keep running into stoked kings fans everywhere. So much better than being in san diego :D

yeeessss!!!

frozen fury, motherfuckers!!!

And for the first time in my many trips to vegas, I have a view of the strip :) and frozen fury is across the street, so I don't have to drive anywhere. Ok, it's 4:12 and we just got here and I'm exhausted and so ready for bed. But there's still mad traffic out there and people everywhere and it's crazy. people are crazy here.

Oh and katie, these overly friendly people were talking to us on the elevator and guess where they're from? MN!!

it's not fair when you do that

do what?
dazzle people.

o hai! on sunday katie and i met robin again. this time HE came up to US and gave us nice, squishy hugs and told us stories about nin's last shows. he's fabulous and he inspired a crapload of robin portraits from a variety of very talented artists. i will share them with you now:

doode

i'm pretty sure that's how you spell it. "doode" means "worm" in arabic. that's the cutest word for it.

today ruled because lgk offered a really good deal on opening night tickets-- good section, great seats and a free shirt! yay! we're on the aisle, too, which is really important to me because i like being able to come and go without having to step over one million people and worrying about knocking over their beers and owing them a 10 dollar beverage. OMG CAN'T BELIEVE THIS SHIT IS IN JUST A WEEK AND A HALF!!!!!!!! this offseason was looooong. and depressing! last season could not have ended in a worse way.

also, thanks to the best site ever (nintourhistory.com), i now know exactly how many times i've seen each song performed. you know what's really not fair? i had to sit through the hand that feeds 28 times. WHAT?! i only got to see reptile 14 times. wretched-16. sin-9. the becoming-6. ruiner, into the void, no, you don't- 2. i only got to see that incredible ruiner solo twice, but i had to sit through the shitty-ass hand that feeds TWENTY EIGHT TIMES!!! at wiltern, i thought it was so funny when the band started playing it and everyone around me groaned. oh well, i'm done complaining. but yeah, that site is so fun! :)

deeeeper than the seeeeeea

ringfinger. that shit is GOOFY!

i burned a copy of phm and then put some b-sides on at the end in an effort to not waste the rest of the disc. so i'm listening to ringfinger and laughing my ass off, and then it ends and then home (one of my very favorite songs of the new batch) comes on. how the same guy wrote both of those songs i do not know.

no seriously

I LOVE YOU!

without you, my life would've been like... a 7 the past couple weeks. wiltern would've still been good, but i'd have been in seats and i dunno. eh.

but thanks to you wiltern was BOMB and then you made the hd footage happen AND you made extra fanboy hd footage happen and then you got ahold of a magic tv to properly display this footage and then you stayed up late and made today happen and today was the best. day. EVER!

you're mystically magical! or was it magically mystical?! i dunno! ok, i'm done now.

!

Today was fabulous!!!

Robin is the nicest man in the universe. And katie... I love you. You're the best!

jellizz!

screen cap of jack johnson from a new commercial for nhl 2k10.

three things:
1. i want that shirt!
2. what is jack johnson doing in that commercial? i'm not complaining, but i'm curious why he was involved. it's interesting watching the kings starting to get some more exposure.
3. jack got so beefy once he got injured and had nothing better to do than work on his upper body. i'm really hoping for more hits like the beauty he laid on ovechkin last season.

TWO WEEKS! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

give her a year

"damn girl! lol robin turned me into a lesbian. his wife AND ashley, wtf. lol."

but seriously, those are two very sexy ladies. and they're two very different kinds of sexy. =P

life is so boring now!

i went outside and it was beautiful and gray and chilly enough to warrant a sweater. WHERE THE HELL WAS THIS WEATHER THE PAST TWO WEEKS WHEN I WAS TRYING MY HARDEST NOT TO GET HEAT STROKE!!!!!!!!! f u weather.

i bought shampoo that smells like strawberries.

i want to watch the glorious hd footage and i can't cuz i don't have a computer that is ready for that jelly.

...and i really want a new imac. i'm obsessed.

ok that's everything.

le poo

the wiltern show was pretty amazing. we got our spots on the right side of the rail, just as katie promised and now i owe her a steak dinner. with a baked potato. my favorite youtube guy ended up right behind me and got some amazing footage. so yay for that. i don't really have a lot to say about the show itself. i will say that i can't remember a nin show that was better performed. every band member was his usual self... on crack. loved every minute of it (except for maybe the dillinger escape plan shitfest and mike garson's undersea adventure solo).

yesterday i was too tired to really be depressed. i got three hours of sleep after having to drive home right after the show (SO BUMMED not to have a post-show @ denny's discussion), stumbled around work, and then basically slept the rest of the day and went through some footage. (btw, i have no idea how to deal with the hd footage i have. i haven't even tried yet, but i have a feeling it's going to piss off my old mac. i need to use someone's fancy new computer to edit this shit). but today... man. today i was sad. i don't actually believe that trent's never going to tour again. that's stupid. but i do believe it's going to be a long while before it ever happens. i'm going to be like, 30. :( and it'll be different. this 4 year run has been incredible. we did what we promised ourselves we'd do back in 2000 when we were like, 13. we went to as many shows as possible and we loved it. it has cost me lots of time and money, but i wouldn't change a thing. those shows are some of the best times i've ever had.

i also feel very satisfied that i got to go to the last show. when trent said this was it, i was like OMG I HAVE TO BE THERE AT THE END!!! and then "the end" ended up being taiwan. =/ and then "the end" was echoplex. =/ i'm so, SO glad "the end" was the wiltern and i'm SO GLAD my wonderful bff is a nutcase and made everything happen the way it did. i'm also SO GLAD the trashy girls and twins failed at life.

...but now that it's done, it's sad.

_____________

after work i decided to distract myself. went to get some remastered beatles music. wound up with abbey road, sgt. pepper and the white album. also finally bought horehound. ...and while all of it is great, i still needed distractions.

but horehound reminded me of jack white's existence, and the fact that if anyone has ever come close to providing a concert experience as satisfying as a nin show then it was jack white. so i went to see it might get loud. which wasn't really a good movie, but was still very entertaining. the edge is laaaaaame though. it was cool learning a little about his style, but the guy is boring! jack white seems like a very disgruntled man. and i was so amused by the love in his eyes for jimmy page. there was one point where jimmy started playing the riff for whole lotta love and i swear, hearts were just bursting out of jack's eyes. he also seemed to really dislike the edge, which was entertaining. jack spent a lot of time talking about how basically technology is ruining music and making people less creative (and i think in a lot of cases i agree with him) and the edge (what's this guy's real name?) thinks technology is the best thing in the universe. jack does not approve. whatever though, in the end it was just cool to watch three really great guitarists sit around and play. swap the edge with robin and then it would have been perfect ;)

and dude, the kung ob woon sen from taste of thai is pretty much one of the most delicious things ever.

tomorrow i'm going to figure out the hd footage situation. that's my goal. that, and laundry.

jim fox would call this "nervous time"

In line at the wiltern, it's hot and sunny and we're at the front of a very long line.I'm feeling super uneasy just like when I first stared going to shows. I'm super curious about what is going to happen tonight. David bowie? It's also nice knowing that after today I will probably never have to do this again because I doubt I'll ever care about a live show as much as this. ok that's the end of this utterly useless blog entry. Bye.

something (almost) not nine inch nails related

ashley from this season of top chef... <3 !
she looks like she could be robin's cute gay sister.

facepalm

this week turned out to be a huge, expensive pain in the ass.

i'm new to my job. i've only been there just over a month... and i asked for three days off. which was fine.

then it turns out i only needed one day off because of the shows getting postponed. THEN they get postponed for next week. wtf? so i secured two more days off next week, but my supervisor is really not happy with me and i can't say that i blame her. but it sucks cuz my week is going to go like this: monday drive up to la. show tuesday. WORK WEDNESDAY. (which means getting out of the show at like 11:30 or 12, getting home at like 2:30 or 3, and getting to work by 7:30. i'm going to die.) drive up to la wednesday night, show thursday, and then work again on friday. i really don't know how i'm going to do it. and when i think of all that i'm going to spend in gas, and that i am going to miss 5 days of work... i cringe at all the money this is costing me. i'm very grateful that the shows were postponed and not just canceled, but i really wish they could've been moved to a weekend. OY!

what's good, though, is that now the wiltern show is the last show and i can finally stop stressing about not making it to the echoplex. i keep remembering not initially getting the wiltern tickets and then sitting there and refreshing the page and refusing to give up, and then i finally got some! and i smile that it turned out this way because katie was so depressed and didn't care about the other three cuz she was obsessed with echoplex. so glad it turned out this way as it's obviously very exciting to be at the last show.

ok i'm done. this is pretty much all we've been thinking about and talking about for the past few days. i think we're gonna watch center stage now to distract ourselves.

this week is going to be both amazing and exhausting.

losing my mind

that's all i did yesterday. lose my mind. waiting in line in that ridiculous heat made me crazy. i spent hours just looking around in disbelief and asking myself "what the hell are you doing here?" then we wound up with a much better spot than we had anticipated, and i couldn't believe it. and then the bass for the second opener was so intense that it made it feel as though the bass was my heartbeat which confused me and made me feel really sick. and then the show started off with mr. self destruct...

...and continued with piggy...

...followed by heresy...

...and i lost my mind like i never have before and exactly how i knew i would if i were ever lucky enough to hear the downward spiral performed in its entirety. it was better than i imagined. by eraser, i was literally holding my head because i felt like it was going to explode. katie put it really well when she said that listening to an album is such a personal thing, and it's such a trip to share that with that entire crowd and the band. when they finished hurt, all i could think was that i just witnessed the best thing ever. and it felt complete. and then i remembered that we had only heard 14 songs and many more were to come. ruiner was SO GOOD LIVE and robin turned that solo OUT. disgusting perfection. and eraser was a little bit different than when aaron/jeordie were in the band (the last time i saw it performed live) and much better. and reptile is always amazing. and the downward spiral has become one of my favorite live songs. and the band looked like they were loving it. i really never believed they'd do this again and i'm still kind of overwhelmed by how perfect the set list was. we got metal and burn and terrible lie and suck... which i must have requested at least 5 times during the day. "i really hope they play suck. i reeeeeeeeally hope they play suck." i missed it!!!

and then, after the show we sat around talking about how perfect it was and how we really couldn't ask for anything more, and we found out that the fonda show was canceled. ...so then i was overcome with "ooooommmmmmgggg whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!?!?!?!" and today sucked because it was like "well, we should've been at the show right now" and it was depressing. i hope they reschedule instead of straight up canceling. but somehow i doubt that will be the case.

...so now i'm still waiting around to see if saturday's show at the wiltern is still on. =/ i hate this.

but at least the palladium show was orgasmic.

hockey, i miss you. come back soon!

omg omg omg omg omg

nin played the entirety of the downward spiral tonight. from mr. self destruct to hurt. i cannot think of something cooler than that. i'm so incredibly jealous of that stupid nyc audience >:( think we'll get something that cool over here on the west coast?!?!

seriously. the more i think about it, the more jealous i become. can you imagine being in that crowd?! like "hell yeah! mr. self destruct!" ... and then piggy... and i'd be like, whoa. that's weird. and then heresy. and i'd be like, WHOA THAT'S WEIRD! and then march of the pigs... and then closer... i'd have lost my mind. it'd be like no fucking way are they doing this. cannot WAIT for the shows!!!!! i'm shivering with antici...


~

i spent this weekend in la. am probably going to spend my birthday up there (and disneyland, whoo!) next weekend. and am going back again the next week and weekend for the last three nin shows. and then a few weeks later for opening night for the kings. so excited! love that town :)

still here. so maybe the problem is me.

|.
i just can't get you out of my head
boy your loving is all i think about
i just can't get you out of my head
boy it's more than i dare to think about

there's a dark secret in me
don't leave me locked in your heart

set me free
feel the need in me
set me free

||.
cast the pearls aside, of a simple life of need
come into my life forever
the crumbled cities stand as known
of the sights you have been shown
of the hurt you call your own
love is suicide

the empty bodies stand at rest
casualties of their own flesh
afflicted by their dispossession
but nobodies ever knew
nobodys
no bodies felt like you
nobodys
love is suicide

now we drive the night, to the ironies of peace
you can't help deny forever
the tragedies reside in you
the secret sights hide in you
the lonely nights divide you in two
all my blisters now revealed
in the darkness of my dreams
in the spaces in between us

|||.

now the bonds are broken, but they can be re-tied
one more journey to the woods, the holes where spirits hide,
it's a never-ending battle, for a piece that's always torn,
"come in," she said, "i'll give ya, shelter from the storm."

well the deputy walks on hard nails and the preacher rides a mount
but nothing really matters much, it's doom alone that counts
and the one-eyed undertaker, he blows a feudal horn
"come in," she said, "i'll give ya, shelter from the storm."

i've heard newborn babies cry like a mournin' dove
and old men with broken teeth stranded without love
do i understand your question, man, "is it hopeless and forlorn?"
"come in," she said, "i'll give ya, shelter from the storm."

now there’s a wall between us, something there's been lost
i took too much for granted, i got my signals crossed
just to think it all began on an uneventful morn,
"come in," she said, "i'll give ya, shelter from the storm."

*_*

last one

unf. i really wanna go see them.

oh shit

i completely forgot about this. what a sassy bitch.




A kid jumped on the stage and interrupted the show. Here is what Jack said if you can't hear it:
"Can we all quiet down for one second? I want everyone to be real, real quiet. And everybody stare at him. Where you going Papa? Where you gonna go now? Everybody's lookin' at you. You got the attention that you wanted. Did mommy and daddy drop you off at the rock concert? And did you come up here to give it to me man?...God damn! I'm real scared player. You like attention. Shall we continue the concert? You'd like that wouldn't ya? We ain't gonna. [the crowd boos.] Hey Eh, easy does it here. Don't worry. He'll get his come-uppance. Don't worry he'll get his come-uppance. I'm sure he'll do a lot of coke and beer (it's alright) after the show. [plays guitar] No more talkin' to him."

eugh

...what a buncha...

...no way...

i just found out that my boss passed away this weekend. i don't know how to feel about it. i think i'm most disturbed by the fact that she was only 34...

...but that doesn't stop me from being SUPER EXCITED about the tickets i got today. sucks i couldn't get echoplex tickets, but i was prepared for that. i'll take 3 of 4. that'll bring my final number to 33. heh.

i miss you.

fuck me! what a shit show!

loooooooooool. i woke up my dad laughing.

and apparently this hitler clip is a youtube phenomenon. there are TONS of clips of hitler finding stuff out. hitler demanding mcdonalds, hitler learning that his car was stolen, hitler finding out michael jackson has died. too funny.

target demographic fail

i'm watching queer as folk on logo right now, and a commercial for girls gone wild came on. WHO are they trying to reach? i highly doubt there are a whole lot of straight guys watching logo at 3 in the morning... and i can't see a lot of lesbians being interested. fail.

velvet goldmine

christian bale with a face full of makeup is the funniest fucking thing. i've seen this movie about a million times now, and i still laugh every time i see him with the blue hair & dreadful makeup, dancing around like a dork.

ewan mcgregor can really sing. i kind of wish he had been an actual rock star instead of an actor. and why doesn't he make more movies?

also, why doesn't jonathan rhys-meyers make more movies? he's stunningly beautiful and i guess an ok actor? i dunno. i've only really seen him in two things-- this and bend it like beckham. hard to judge.

something else i'll never get over is that thom yorke is singing up a storm all over the movie and it doesn't even sound like him because he's not whining and he's enunciating. but still, ewan's vocals > thom's vocals.

---

there are a lot of good tours happening right now. i want to see the dead weather (btw, i'm so envious of jack white's talent. he kind of reminds me of joey when joey would start playing piano and be like "what? i'm not good... i never took lessons..." and he could sing and play drums and a million other things... i hated him for being so fucking talented. ...but i guess i'm more in awe of jack's talent, and less jealous... k bye), regina spektor, placebo, and obviously trent. i know i'm leaving something out. (and i wish manson would tour NOT with that stupid "rockstar energy drink mayhem festival"...wtf? but just headlining in normal venues like a normal band). but it always happens this way. why do all the people i want to see tour at the same time? all the shows in end of august/early september. ARGH. and the thing is, trent ALWAYS takes priority and that's where all my money and time goes. and i'm ok with that. but still, i've missed out on some other good stuff because of bad timing. =/

also, it's pretty obnoxious because, like, regina and dead weather are only playing la. which isn't that far, but still takes a day away from me because it's not like i can just drive there after work.

ok i'm done complaining about this. i'm just waiting for trent to announce ticket prices and then i'll have a clearer picture of what i'm doing. i'm expecting them to be a helluva lot cheaper than the nin|ja shit, but you never know.

domo arigato

what's better than waking up to breakfast in bed on a nice, lazy saturday?

sleeping in and waking up to sushi in bed. :)



btw, the ticket situation for the last shows is really stressing me out.

everything is more miserable in sd

my interview wasn't an interview at all. i'm still confused.

i really miss sf. i had so much fun. and i really miss the weather.

the acquisition of scuderi and smyth, plus the way the last season ended, have made me very excited for next season. i can't believe it's only july. argh!

oh, and i hate trent. those extra dates at the end? so cool. except i won't be able to get tickets face value. i know it. i'm having flashbacks of when they played soma. although this time i'm sure scalped tickets will cost a whole hell of a lot more than 100 bucks. :(

...i can't wait to see harry potter next week, though. :)

i just wrapped up an itunes shopping spree (had a gift card) and can't wait to lay down and listen to my new stuff!

my feet have turned into blisters

dude, it's so fun here. i only have two complaints:
1. i forgot my walking shoes and san francisco involves a lot of walking. whoops.
2. there is definitely inadequate signage when it comes to public transportation. it can be very frustrating.

this place is like heaven. i haven't seen any douche trucks since i've been here. you know, the really ridiculously big ones that have gigantic wheels and angry men driving them? the ones that you can find in abundance in san diego? yeah, they don't exist here. love it.

also, it's the land of cute dogs. we hung out in the castro yesterday and today, as well as in the mission district (i think it's called) and i've never seen so many cute dogs in my life. and i love that a lot of the dog owners are happy men and when you say something like "omg your dog is adorable!" they get excited with you and say "isn't he?!"

another thing i've noticed is that everyone smiles a lot. and says hi. i'm used to accidentally catching someone's eye and then both parties look away awkwardly. here's it's like "OH HAI!" it's nice.

i really liked the nordstrom's cafe in union square. it's really high up and you can sit right by a window and look out at union square. and it's fancy and not really expensive. i got a goat cheese and leek tart with an herb salad... which is not something i'd even heard of before, but it was great. yay nordstrom's cafe.

japantown was fun as always and i may have to go back tomorrow to pick up a few things i didn't buy last time because i didn't feel like carrying them around.

we went to the japanese tea garden today. it was really beautiful but a little bit crowded. it made taking pictures annoying because i wanted pictures of the scenery without random people in the way. oh well.




tomorrow's my last full day here and i'm going to be by myself... which is ok, i guess. i just really don't know what i want to do. i haven't been to the wharf yet, but i always go there so i can probably skip it. we drove by the whole haight & ashbury area but didn't stop, so i think i'll visit tomorrow. i want to see what's going on in the amoeba. i've been told that it's better than the one in hollywood. although it does look a lot smaller from the outside, so i don't see how it could be better...

i kind of want to go back to castro... or maybe chinatown? but only if my feet feel a lot better because chinatown is pretty hilly from what i can recall. ugh i don't know. ok sleep.

Just landed in san francisco. It's weird travelling alone.
O.o

where's waldo?

nhl network is re-airing a game between dallas and anaheim from the 2008 playoffs. that's the series where i was able to get REALLY GOOD seats. i just saw myself on tv. i was just sitting there looking delighted. heh. k bye. :D

remember the time when it was four in the morning and you were like, "let's go."

it didn't matter where.

so we went.

turning point.

pffft

my mom wanders into the kitchen while i'm cooking for my dad and i and goes "what's for dinner?"

and i say "rice with yogurt and tofu"

and she made the most disapproving noise ever. pffffpbtht -ish.

needless to say, she didn't want any.

whatever dude. it's good.

"i'll give you a cervical exam"

in the running for worst pickup line ever, y/y?

i just picture him diving in there, head first. EW!

you know what's absurd?

that marijuana is illegal. legalize that shit and then tax it. allow the gays to get married. and then, guess what california? your money problems definitely shrink.

:D

things that never fail to make me crack up:


1. pavel datsyuk speaking english. and this clip of him, too:



2. jack white's vocals live. especially on the older songs, because the older the song the more he jazzes up the vocals. i was listening to "black math" live on the way to work this morning, and i swear he's squawking more than he's singing for most of the song. when katie and i saw the white stripes twice a few years ago during their week at the greek, i remember that parts of "ball & biscuit" had transformed into some sassy soul singing. i've yet to find a live recording of that song with jack doing that, but i'm still on the hunt. SO ENTERTAINING!

3. still on the live vocals thing... nine inch nails back-up vocals are pretty damn funny. the jeordie/aaron tandem was great (it was mostly jeordie that was hilarious, though, because aaron's actually not a terrible singer), but robin finck takes the cake. listening to him scream "MY GOD I DON'T THINK I CAN LAST HERE!!!" never gets old. he's too funny.

4. the jim mora playoffs clip. lol. PLAYOFFS?!?!?!



5. this silly ho. i love how she crossed her legs for the picture.





ok and that sums up my morning. BYE!

really old giggles, rediscovered

speaking of old stuff.... remember deschatelets? lol.

everyone is being entirely unreasonable

today was draft day. i'm excited because that means the end of the incessant and RIDICULOUS rumors that have been floating around for weeks now. i'll admit, some of them are fun but i was getting really tired of hearing "heatley." ANYHOW-- i'm excited the kings chose schenn. he's a great player. but what i really liked about the whole thing was brian burke's temper tantrums. i loved the whole "Everyone is being entirely unreasonable" whining and i LOVE that the camera cut right to him when dean announced he was drafting schenn. burke looked like he hadn't slept in a while and was just sitting there shaking his head in disgust. although it wasn't quite the meltdown i was hoping for, it was still pretty good. i also loved the commentators being like "ooooh he's maaaaaaad." so i guess if burke wants the schenn boys to play together so badly, he'll just have to deal luke to us. :D

also, burke ended up drafting a player of lebanese descent... and when that happened, my dad popped his head in the room and was like "hmmm??????!!!" i swear, my dad has a radar. the second anyone says "lebanon" or "arabic" or "hummus" within 100 feet, he'll run over and want to know what's going on.

ok, so yeah. the most exciting part of the draft is finished. NOW the off-season really begins. except for free agency, there's really nothing going on for the next few months. poop.


...at least there's sf next weekend :)

edit: i just bought the tickets! scary! but i got good seats. yay.

also, thanks to my trusty buddies @ lgk, i now have a brian burke disapproval gif. this was right after schenn was selected:




last edit: you hear a lot about how swedish women are beautiful. prof tom was always talking about the swedish bikini team. but what nobody talks about is swedish guys. why am i thinking about this? watching the draft, all the swedish guys so far are so pretty! ok bye.

no, THIS is the last edit, i swear!: still watching the draft, which is being held in montreal. because of this, many of the clubs are having a french speaking staff member address the crowd in french. i swear, i cannot tell the difference between the native quebecois speakers and the native english speakers who just speak iffy french. they both sound weird and i can hardly understand either one.

aww :(

bye-bye michael jackson. thanks so much for some of the best pop songs ever.

yup, this is more like it

when the first transformers came out, EVERYONE tried to convince me to go see it. seriously everybody i speak to, except for katie, told me it was amazing and so entertaining and had stunning special effects. and i was like, you're all morons.

ok, maybe that's harsh, but how on earth are good special effects an important factor in judging a movie? anyhow, the movie looked like total trash. it looked like if i went, i'd be trying to stab my eyes out with my soda straw within 10 minutes of the movie starting. it looked like my idea of film hell. i can't even explain it really. the movie gave me a rage just looking at the previews and i couldn't fathom ever, EVER going to go see it and i couldn't fathom anyone ever enjoying it in the history of the universe. plus, shia leboeuf (or however the fuck you spell it)??? what a dork. NO!

so when i heard there was a transformers 2, i began bracing myself for another round of "no really, roseline, you have to go see it! i KNOW you don't like those kinds of movies but i promise this one is different! it's surprisingly good! you'll like it, i swear!" and who knows, that could still happen, but i've been relieved that the reviewers are finding this flick SO bad that they just sit there and openly mock it. mind you, i've never seen the first transformers (duh) and i won't be seeing the second one, but i really feel an almost scary hatred for the franchise (it represents all that is evil about the movie industry... which is an industry i don't particularly care about, but that is probably because of bullshit like transformers) and it makes me feel very satisfied to see these kinds of reviews.

like this

lol:
"LaBoeuf projects a pathetic, wall-eyed dorkhood, when he's not babbling like a tumor removed from Woody Allen's prostate that somehow achieved sentience."

oh, and:
"If you want to save yourself the ticket price, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination."

now maybe my friends and family can get on board and maybe they won't harass me about going to see it! YAY!

YES!

the nhl network is my new boyfriend. i have been avoiding watching it because i didn't want to hear anything about the penguins winning the cup, but it turns out they're not showing endless pens celebrations! they're showing... PLAYOFF HOCKEY RERUNS!!! YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but wait, it gets better. not only are they showing reruns, they're from 2008!!!! that's just like watching new games because i so don't remember the details of the playoffs from last year. oh my. nhl network, i <3 u, bb. (right now i'm watching sharks/flames game 5... i TOTALLY forgot how intense this series was! great stuff!)


oh, also, i saw UP again and it was even better the second time. seriously, if you haven't seen it then GO!

saturday.

today was wonderful.

1. 5-hour energy may taste like ass, but it really works. i was falling asleep on the couch (actually, i think i did fall asleep briefly) and miguel handed me the 5-hour energy and after hacking and gagging through it, i was wide awake. like, CRACKHEAD awake. wow.

2. off the bone by the cramps is the perfect record to play disney princess uno to. it made me want to take the disney princesses to a ghoulish 60s beach party. and that made me want to go to the whaley house. maybe next weekend.

3. saw Up. it is the best movie i have seen in a very long time. touching and funny and detailed and features lots and lots of dogs. :) i definitely want to see it again.

4. discovered a good place to play pool. cheap and not too crowded and nobody paid attention to us. i hate when you go to a pool hall and everyone is checking out how everyone else is doing. i suck so hard at pool and don't like having an audience.

---

debating whether to go to san francisco this weekend or the next one. if i go this weekend, it'll cost a lot more but i'll get to go to pride. if i go the next weekend, the flight is a loooot cheaper and i'll get to be there for 4th of july. and i'm sure there are plenty of scenic places in such a hilly city to catch fireworks. hmm... what's funny is i haven't looked around at fares on other airlines. i kind of refuse to fly with anyone other than virgin america.

i still miss hockey. at least the draft is friday. either the kings will have made a huge trade by then or we're picking 5th. either way it should be good. and the last hurrah for quite a while. ... october :(

got the shakes

hockey withdrawals! totally dissatisfied with the way the season ended, obviously. i'm missing my carolina and detroit stanley cup dvds (why are they both missing?! they're off hanging out together and crying about how the pens punked them both).

...AND prime ticket is doing these wednesday re-runs of classic kings games and of course fucking cox cable doesn't carry prime ticket. i seriously hate cox cable! why anyone would choose it over directv is beyond me. but that's another topic.

my main point is that i miss hockey. i go through this every off season and it's always so sad :(

peektures

i was looking through my hundreds of photo booth pictures today, and i realized two things:

1. damn, a lot of good memories are captured there
2. 75% of my pictures are of peekers

so i chose my favorites and made a flickr album. you can look at it, if you want to.




peek and i invite you to go here

whoa

seen those dustin lance black nudie pics? 0__0

poop

well, i was right about the wings losing the cup. i went 14/15 in playoff predictions. if i had bet, i'd be so rich right now.

...but i wish i had been wrong :(

oh well, now 2 things happen:
1. no hockey for several months. BOO!
2. i can't even get the dvd of the finals and other select playoff games (like i have the past few years) to hold me over until next season starts, because i fucking hate the penguins. i really don't need to own any dvds that involve them, unless they're busy losing. RUDE! but it kind of sucks because now i'll have an incomplete collection.

this is the first time i've watched a team i really like lose in the finals. i started following the finals closely in the 2000-2001 season with the wings winning and the canes losing. from there, the losers were (and let's see if i can do this without looking it up): ducks, flames, no finals (stupid lockout), oilers, senators, penguins and now the wings. i think that's right. so yeah... i usually like watching the loser's reaction. because i'm mean like that. but it's toooootally different when you actually like the guys who just lost. whatever, though, the wings have had the cup twice this decade so i think they'll be ok. i'm just sad that the loss had to come at the hands of the pens. OH! btw i totally knew malkin was mvp. all my lgk buds were saying fleury, but i don't think fleury was really all that fantastic. the pens' supposed inferior defense were great and fleury got some really lucky bounces tonight. malkin, on the other hand, is a stud and i will continue to be a fan of his. fuck crosby, MALKIN is the star. and he's a lot less whiny. and he doesn't have a dirty sanchez stache.

ok so now it's time for the off season, the draft and wild speculation about crazy dean-o trades.

movies are too expensive

i just saw drag me to hell. contrary to what seems to be popular opinion, it isn't scary and i didn't really like it. however, it did make me think the following things:

1. i really want to watch a good horror movie. any suggestions? preferably something old and creepy and involving ghosts or ghouls from a graveyard. i don't need lots of blood and i definitely don't need lots of special effects.

2. it reminds me of a nightmare i had about an old lady. my dream would've made a much scarier movie than drag me to hell. seriously. i told my dad about it and the conclusion literally made him jump. oooooooh.....

3. just how old is alison lohman? she has looked 18 forever.

4. that justin long guy is a major, MAJOR dork. i want to beat him up and then give him a wedgie.

5. who cares how old she is, i think i've fallen in love with her. that girl is beeeeeeeeautiful!

dude

just came across ANOTHER flickr with amazing nin shots and then the next thing in the photostream is hockey. it's too weird!!!!!

brilliant!

wrbcm2 (11:42:30 AM): yeah
wrbcm2 (11:42:39 AM): sounds like an order of balls is in order
wrbcm2 (11:42:41 AM): lol
wrbcm2 (11:42:44 AM): no offense



not offended. after all, i'm not the one you called ball-less.

here again

my eyes don't feel like they're working properly. the solid outlines of things aren't coming through, and the lights are all too bright. and it all swirls in my head and makes me feel both sleepy and high.

it's 1:30 in the morning. i'm sitting in my driveway, and it's very cold. but out here, right now, it's the closest thing to total silence i can find tonight. there is a faint trickle of water from the sewer/gutter thing across the street. and every so often, a car drives by, just up the hill. but between those moments, i can think.

my life is at a standstill.

GO! go go go go go ... for years, i had a map. and i made all the appropriate, expected mistakes. but with every passing day, every time i put it off or make the wrong decision, i feel as though i've been taken out of the cycle. everyone, everything will continue and i'll just sit here. if i never find my way back and i spend every night on this driveway, nobody will miss me.

there are some birds chirping, too. wtf, birds? shouldn't you wait until there's light out?

i wish you were here. or you'd call. or write.

i can't tell if i'm making the right choice. if i'm doing right by me. of course i'm making the "right" choice.

i think about this all the time. but because we're seldom honest, i don't know how much of it is just me. projecting. pretending. miscalculating. (my ankle really hurts, what did i do to it?)

part of the problem: i don't believe you. surely there are others. me. come on, me?
i just think you love access.

yes... functional. reliable. i guess so. just there. responsibly. just there... but, you know? i get it. part of THIS (and i do mean ALL OF THIS RIGHT HERE) forever and ever and always has been, part of it means i get it. i'll step out of the way, adjust my expression before it bothers you.

because i get it. and this wall, this cold, exist
because i get it.

they (and me), they should just move. continue along, performing. peripheral. you can merge, but make sure you go unnoticed. superficial, but substantially so. and only some of us get it.

so here we go, doing this in chapters. no, episodes. NO! ROUNDS! like boxing. we do get good ones in on each other. we're brutal.

all the chaos, and cruelty, never mattered because you never asked because you never looked because you never knew you had to because all the while the dazzler held you. you see? superficial, but substantial.

AND I GET THAT.

but the one i have, don't think has seen. don't know the motive. laziness? exhaustion? confusion? surely this can't be all there is. and you... well, i still don't believe you.

it's getting really cold now. it's 1:49. i work tomorrow. you haven't called. i feel like sleeping out here. if i had a tent, i would. your warmth...

right now i'm thinking about the last time. it was so, so bad.

someone just drove by and slowed to a near dead-stop when they saw me. what the hell is she doing?

what the hell ARE you doing? are you going tomorrow? how about the 20th? when are you coming? all of you need to stop. it won't matter either way. i promise that nobody will notice if i'm not there tomorrow.

hello? i'm confident that somewhere there exists evidence that

NO

"confident" is a lie. maybe though you'll exist. right now i'm feeling like the only one.
every indication to the contrary is reaching and make believing and ignoring.
glossing over.
being dutiful.
i believe you called it "trying."

i know what i want to do but i'm just going to keep trying instead.

BAM!

i love this new system. i supply the footage, someone else does the work and makes the gif.

yup

game 7, everyone will be watching except for me because i'll be at work. FML

heh

please, PLEASE deja vu!

OMG TOMORROW IS GAME 6 omg omg omg omgomgowmeirwnmoerinwerolsinfdwer2. detroit is going to lose game 6. i know all about it. they're gonna looooose. but here are two reasons i really need them to win:

1. omg please don't leave it up to a game 7. please wrap it up IN pittsburgh. don't give them a chance to win it. i will cry a thousand oceans if that happens. :(
pleeeeeeeeease detroit.

2. game 7 would be on friday. i have to work friday. the closing shift. i'm seriously going to be a wreck if game 7 of the stanley cup finals is happening and i'm not watching. it's going to be TORTURE not checking the score. seriously, i won't be able to handle it.

so yeah, do it tomorrow. please do it tomorrow. like last year. win it in game 6 in detroit. i believe in the power of datsyuk!


oh, and totally unrelated:

weird, perverted uncle jeordie

hardrockchick's review of the manson album included this:

"WOW: Has Manson been playing World of Warcraft? This song is fucking weird. It has Jeordie written all over it. Which means there is something sort of endearing about it, but I’m scratching my head a bit. And shaking my ass a little."

i just giggle because that was my first reaction. they let jeordie loose!!! but i don't really agree with her beyond this because i think the song deserves a lot more love. in fact, i'm going to go listen to it right now, dance in my seat, and try to guess what the fuck jeordie was on when this song happened.

(also, i don't have the album so i don't have the credits so if jeordie ISN'T responsible for this masterpiece, please don't burst my bubble)

i'm not pure evil

listening to 10 miles high and decided to answer your 8 messages, in order.

1. i know.
2. probably true.
3. you don't know what i think.
4. definitely true.
5. i don't.
6. that's always nice.
7. oh boy do i know that.
8. dunno. but i am right now. duh.

oh man. the wings spanked the pens 5-0 tonight. it was such a good game that i actually had THREE people watching with me! the whole time! and they were yelling and cheering too! it was fun :)

one more win to the stanley cup... come on girlfriends, i know you can do it.

whoa. listening to the goon moon album (licker's last leg) on head phones for the first time. much better this way.

sad that i don't love the new manson album. it's REALLY hit or miss. and, more than once, there are songs with great music but i can't take the stupidity of the lyrics. oh well. although i LOVE that woooooow song. actually really like the way manson did the vocals.

switched the skullcandy ones for sony. these are much more comfortable and the sound is great. success!

i'm poor

so i redeemed some credit card points to get a best buy gift card. i used that gift card to buy new headphones (cuz my ears are too small for the ones that come with the ipod) and a new cd wallet (since my old ones were stolen, boooo). i got a wallet that holds 144 cds. i think that'll be fine.

so i bought the same skullcandy ear buds i had that were stolen, but for some reason these sound like shit. they're fuzzy and bass heavy. and they were more expensive than my last ones. wtf? so i guess that means i'm going back to best buy tomorrow and switching them. this makes me sad. i have cramps and i just wanted to lay down with peek and listen to music. :(

anyhow, i decided to have a cd burning party tonight and start replacing the stuff that's gone. i'm getting really sick of the few that i have left in the car. i knew i was running low on blank cds, but i had no idea i only had 9 left! it was incredibly stressful trying to decide which ones take priority. i won't have money to buy a new stack of blanks for a few weeks at least, so i reeeeeeeally spent a lot of time deciding what i wanted. my results kind of surprised me.

the ones i burned, in order:
1. nin- the fragile (left) (the right side wasn't stolen, yay!)
2. nin- with teeth
3. marilyn manson- mechanical animals (wtf, really?)
4. tori amos- boys for pele
5. david bowie- best of (i couldn't pick a specific album)
6. madonna- ray of light (dunno why. it was irresistible for some reason).
7. velvet underground & nico
8. tori amos- scarlet's walk
9. the white stripes- get behind me satan

so hopefully i'll be happy with those decisions later on this week.

---

also, the red wings are ruining my life. or maybe the pens are. or maybe the refs are. i'm not exaggerating when i say i'm scared to watch tomorrow's game. game 4 pissed me off so much, i just don't think i can handle another crapfest like that. i also don't think i can handle it if the pens actually pull this thing off. i will shut that shit OFF. >:O

which makes me wonder how bad i'm going to be when the kings are in the playoffs.

---

got a raise at work. it's nice. my hourly is actually like, decent now. it's weird to think i'm making almost double what i used to make when i started working. it's also weird to know that i could be making waaaaaay more if i actually applied myself to finding a "real" job. which i know i need to do soon. i'm getting really sick of dealing with stupid customers. and, because of the tough economic climate, we're advertising some really low rates in some unusual places and attracting a whole new customer base. and some of these fuckers are ANNOYING. i miss the rich people who didn't argue anything. they were bomb.

---

last random thing. if you marinate extra firm tofu in lime juice and some soy sauce, it's reeeeeeeeeally good. stir fry with onions and broccoli and then put it over brown rice. best ever. i'ma make that for the game tomorrow.

the nhl and you

i've been spending a lot of time looking around on flickr lately. thanks to trent's wonderful relaxed camera policy for this tour, people are taking some beautiful pictures. so anyhow, several times in the past few days, while looking through somebody's photostream (not a specific album), the pictures have abruptly gone from nine inch nails related to hockey related. on twitter and on the forums, i've seen several hockey icons. lots of penguins/detroit mentions. i haven't come across any soccer, basketball, baseball or football stuff. just lots of hockey.

why is this? i mean, i love it but i kind of don't get it. WHO are hockey fans? where do they come from? besides canada.

i've also heard quite a few times that hockey fans are the most affluent of all major team-sport fans. hmmm... so that made me curious to go look up hockey fan demographics.

i found one pretty good study from experian research that came out last november. it compared nhl, mls, mlb, nfl and nba.

hockey fans are the youngest, the richest, the most tech-savvy, most into gadgets and most likely to buy crap online (obviously this research was geared to advertisers).

the mean household income part went: nhl, mls, nba, mlb and then nfl. i guess that makes sense since the reverse order is the order of popularity, right? and nfl and mlb are pretty damn close. so i guess the more fans, the lower the mhhi since you're appealing to the widest variety of people.

what surprised me is that hockey fans are the youngest. why is that? this sport has been around forever and ever. there are lots of classic rivalries. but now that i think about it, there really aren't that many old people at the games. it's usually young, hip-looking people in leather jackets and frameless glasses. everyone looks mildly european. or they're in a jersey. but i always assumed that was because we were in la. but then, at a baseball game, there are craploads of old folks. hmmm...

nhl fans are 20% more likely than other fans to "try to keep up with latest technology"

11% more likely to own a digital camera, 10% more likely to own an mp3 player.

i dunno... there are tons of stats. i wonder if there is a musical preference demographic study. there are probably tons.

i don't really know why i posted this other than i thought it was interesting. oh, and that it helped me come to some kind of mean conclusions that i won't share here... but it's nice to save the stats as a reference, i guess.

fuck you, nhl disciplinarians

malkin should've been suspended for this game. this isn't my opinion, it's according to the rule you assholes wrote. and then magically didn't apply to the superstar. and then did you just hide the whistles so the refs couldn't call anything? annoying game tonight.

you know what's not annoying?



...dear god. what does that look like?

0_0

stella is my hero.

abdelkader3000

he looks like napoleon dynamite's dorkier brother. i'm so disappointed that someone with a cool name like abdelkader doesn't look like a mean, destructive robot.
also, osgood has a total baby-face. how old does he look to you?

meathead called it

"Hi Roseline,

Thank you so much for saying so! Thrilled to hear that you were into all aspects of the experience. Great!

Best,
Justin"


i'm so amused right now.

wiggle wiggle

but seriously... the wings won game 2. they actually probably didn't deserve to win, but the fact is that they still did. they got lucky on some non-calls (including one offsides that nobody else has mentioned, so maybe i'm crazy). the pens hit a shitload of posts. and fleury let in one very, VERY bad goal.

...but the team of the old men won 2 games in a row on back to back nights. being that i picked the pens to not only win, but overwhelmingly so, you can color me shocked. and DELIGHTED. two things:

1. it's the kids making it happen. filppula, ericsson, ABDELKADER! and helm making a big splash, even without scoring goals. holy shit, this team is going to be good forever and ever. zetterberg hasn't even scored yet. neither has hossa. datsyuk isn't even playing. no problem. i knew this team had depth, i just had no idea how strongly that depth would pull through. and ericsson just had an appendectomy. oh i said that already? tough. i'm still impressed because he's just SOLID. draws a penalty, scores a goal, and plays some pretty good defense. oh, and not to mention he's really pretty, too.



2. wings haven't even played well yet. they're tired and beat up. i think after this day of rest, they'll be a lot better. now, i don't believe they'll win game 3 in pittsburgh. i think if the pens are going to win any game, it'll be that one. but i just expect to see better hockey from the wings. also, they're supposed to have datsyuk back. and maybe draper. if that happens... oh wow.


a lot of people are complaining about this series so far, and some of it is justified. yeah, tonight the officiating sucked and they missed a lot of calls. and the majority of those should've been on the wings. but the pens dodged a bullet with malkin avoiding suspension for the instigator. BUT the pens avoided lots of calls in game 1. don't forget.

ok whatever. i'm tired and rambling. all this started just because i wanted an excuse to post the wiggle wiggle gif.